Have you ever greeted someone with, “Hey, how you doing?” and they proceeded to
tell you? The answer can take a while.

I bet you know a guy who always asks your opinion on some hot topic in the news.
When you begin to tell him your thoughts, it becomes apparent he wants you to finish so that
he can give you HIS opinion.

We all like to talk about ourselves!

If you want to build a good relationship, you not only want to LET them talk, you want
to ENCOURAGE them to talk! Not only will it make them enjoy being around you more, but it
helps find out information about the person. Why were they late getting home? Do they like to
go to sporting events? What’s their favorite food?

If you want another person to “open up” with you, concentrate on being a good
listener.

The most important thing you can do to be a good listener is act and look interested.
Try and maintain an even level gaze with your eyes.

Avoid distractions such as looking at your watch, answering a text, or waving at your
boyfriend.

For goodness’ sake, do not INTERRUPT! If the other person interrupts me, I assume what
I am saying is unimportant to them, and I may stop talking!

Give them good feedback by nodding and showing them an “open” body language
position. No crossing of the arms across your chest! That tells the other person you don’t like
the message they are sending.

Our Creator gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason!

Jim Leach is the author of “You Can Tell ME, Effective Interviewing Made Simple,” available at
booksbyleach.com